Fear is Your Ally

Fear is your Ally

In your determination to live to your absolute fullest possibilities, fear is an unwavering ally. When it comes to pointing out exactly what you must attend to so that you will live to your absolute highest possibility, fear is pivotal. In fact, your fears come precisely at those times when your highest truth. And you also most need to reconnect with your Real Self. Quickly grabbing your attention, fear is the perfect vehicle to immediately place you in a choice point, once you are aware of what its purpose really is.

As an individual committed to being all that you can be in this life, to sing your song and make your difference, fear is a powerful ally. A shift in perspective is essential for anyone who intends to be fully alive and fully functioning.

When fear is present, the usual reaction is to respond as you always have, in other words, from your previous conditioning. This conditioned reaction, following well-worn neural pathways, automatically focuses your psychic energy on either a flight or fight strategy when encountering fear.

This conditioned response to fear occurs mostly on an unconscious level starting very early in life. Your habitual ways of dealing with your fears, over and over again, create personal blind spots and blocks to full wakefulness that then prevent a total openness to opportunities, as they present themselves. Instead, we attend to the same feelings, same reactions, and same outcomes. Usually this path of least resistance serves self-protection rather than self-actualization.

Programmed into your very neurophysiology, this reaction-response to fear itself always has the same result – mediocrity. No break through, no change in outcome and certainly no living to your best. Mass consensus trance keeps us all habitually following preprogrammed thought, feeling and behavioral patterns. The fundamental understanding of fear is that it is bad and that it means something terrible is and will happen.

Attention, ruled by fear, will never lead to fulfilling your destiny. Attention ruled by joy, however, will always point you directly to your perfect next steps in your vocational fulfillment. Fear is an ally to those who are living fully and creating the lives they love. Were you to fully understand how powerful fear can be in propelling you forward into your own extra-ordinary being-ness, you would come to appreciate those times of fear in a whole new way.


Fear brings alertness. Of course, the primary job of fear, speaking in terms of our human physiology, is to warn us when we are facing real physical danger. However, it has also been found to quite commonly feed off imagined possibilities as well. This of course has been strongly influenced by our previous programming. We react to fear, whether real or imagined, the same way. While it is essential when real to be alerted, it is the imagined dangers that the most problems and solicits the habitual responses.

Fear brings the gift of awakening, showing you where you are limiting your fullest expression and awakening to your life. Fear shows you where you are hiding out in your life. You constrict your experience of joy and therefore your calling as a result. How else are you going to know where you are stuck and boxed in, except for those times when your fear points it out to you.

Living to your full potential and engaging your life’s work demand that you walk this alternative and contrary path.  This mostly overlooked perception of the role that fear plays in your own personal evolution is what distinguishes those who live out their days in sameness and smallness from those who live a joyful and charmed life.

Biochemically speaking, fear and joy are the same. These are just two sides of the same coin. How you choose to interpret the situation when fear is present then is what will free you to emerge again and again into your joy and your truth which this circumstances of this situation present to you. In another way, I could say, the situation that precipitates fear presents you with the option of either reacting as always or deciding that this time, you will see it as a gift, and move into your larger, creative presence that is your Authentic self.

The secret to understanding and benefiting from your fear, is to simply know that fear shows up to refocus your attention on where joy is absent in your life. When joy is absent, so is calling, and so are YOU.  It is these precise moments that catch you in the act of playing small. You have forgotten who you are and where you are headed. Of course, you have also forgotten your higher truth, which is that you are always creating your reality, whether it is a reality chosen by powerful cultural influences outside your self or a consciously chosen path to discover what you are truly capable of.

Working with your Ally

Fear is an emotion.  As emotions go, they move and change, always. Now, when you normally experience fear, your tendency is to focus ever so briefly on how it feels (and of course know you don’t like it) and then jump immediately into your head. Here, in your head, you get to figure it out, analyze it, brainstorm ways to make it disappear or find a way to muster your resources to fight what is happening.

Conditioned responses are hard to break, especially at first. It takes time to reorient your self and begin looking to your fears as showing you your next step forward to fulfilling your life’s work. It is natural to constrict when fear shows up. At first, you don’t have a choice in your reaction to fear. But a certain point comes when you can disengage, and it is precisely this point when you have the choice to make your transition from conditioned response to authentic encounter.

The first step is simply to feel your fear. Feel it and become completely acquainted with it. Each fear has its own flavor and course that it takes throughout your body. Fully awake means just that. Be awake and when fear is present, acknowledge it, feel it and be open to new possibilities. As you allow your self to feel fear in your body, you will find that at first it may seem overwhelming, occupying all of your awareness. But with some time, fear begins to change, move around physically within your body. Just let your attention follow it. With more time passing, you will come to a point when the intensity of fear just stops dominating your awareness. I am not suggesting here that you dwell on it but simply feel it, without allowing the usual jump to the mind. Ignore the mental chatter about it and stay present with your fear.

This may be hard at first but will certainly feel more natural and have a sense of rightness about it. As your attention continues to stay on your bodily sensation of fear, you can begin to allow your attention to also notice that fear is occurring against a backdrop. Fear is much like the cloud that moves across the sky. Quite naturally, let your awareness attune to the background, the sky, behind your fear. As you do this, you will find that fear can be present and so can this more expanded state of awareness.

This expanded state of awareness is your authentic self. It is where joy resides and you may with time be able to bring this joy into the background even as fear is present. It is in this ability to be present with your fear that brings clarity to the situation as well. Fear comes at different times and for different reasons so it is always a puzzle at first. What you can always count on is the answer to the puzzle lies in the direction of you expanding into your Larger Self.

As you work with your fear ally, you will come to appreciate the simplicity of this emotion and how directly connected it is to your own source of joy. You will also welcome these moments, though usually not pleasant at first, as moments of break through and times of breaking through to deeper and more expanded expressions of who you are and what you are here to do.

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